More Remedial Education?
Why is it that the simplest, most crucial life lessons are the ones we have to keep relearning. I know this is not the first time I've understood this principle. This week God drove it home in a powerful way. Eight months ago I had surgery. As you would expect the bills were numerous. Insurance seemed to have done its fair share but we were still in the process of paying the remainder.
On Monday a letter arrived from the hospital inquiring about a bill of $18,000 we had not paid. It sounded like the insurance company was not going to pay any more. I felt like I had been socked in the gut. How were we going to handle that much additional debt? Calling the insurance company only increased the heaviness in the center of my being. At some odd point perhaps after sharing with the 3rd or 4th person about the dreaded bill, an overwhelming thought entered my head. I'm acting like I am alone in this and God is nowhere to be found. What if this is somehow my fault and we have to pay all $18,000? There is no indication in scripture that God suddenly visits a remote spot in his creation when a child of his makes a mistake. God has graciously helped us to deal with all kinds of situations in the past and He has not changed. No matter what the source of the problem, nothing could limit God's love for me and his ability to make this turn out for our good and God's glory.
After visiting the hospital and still not understanding what happened and how to deal with this unexpected bill, it seemed calling the insurance company again was my best option. I quickly decided against that as I remembered the frustration of past calls to large companies. I decided to call instead the woman from the doctor's office who had been very helpful at the time of the surgery. She told me the name of the man at the hospital who would call later that day and hopefully give me some answers. He did and we are now waiting for a revised bill.
Lesson learned. A wiser me now deals with all of life's problems. Not so quickly. I can be very thick headed. Later in the week I dealt with a company who had supposedly reserved a truck for us to move some things. At the last moment I discovered that our truck was not available. This time the walls of my kitchen threatened to enclose me. That feeling was only for a moment. I did panic and change companies. Again the question came into my head "Is God in this or am I acting like I'm alone?" Maybe tattooing the question on my hand would help or perhaps not using the question for just big problems but also for the little happenings of life.
On Monday a letter arrived from the hospital inquiring about a bill of $18,000 we had not paid. It sounded like the insurance company was not going to pay any more. I felt like I had been socked in the gut. How were we going to handle that much additional debt? Calling the insurance company only increased the heaviness in the center of my being. At some odd point perhaps after sharing with the 3rd or 4th person about the dreaded bill, an overwhelming thought entered my head. I'm acting like I am alone in this and God is nowhere to be found. What if this is somehow my fault and we have to pay all $18,000? There is no indication in scripture that God suddenly visits a remote spot in his creation when a child of his makes a mistake. God has graciously helped us to deal with all kinds of situations in the past and He has not changed. No matter what the source of the problem, nothing could limit God's love for me and his ability to make this turn out for our good and God's glory.
After visiting the hospital and still not understanding what happened and how to deal with this unexpected bill, it seemed calling the insurance company again was my best option. I quickly decided against that as I remembered the frustration of past calls to large companies. I decided to call instead the woman from the doctor's office who had been very helpful at the time of the surgery. She told me the name of the man at the hospital who would call later that day and hopefully give me some answers. He did and we are now waiting for a revised bill.
Lesson learned. A wiser me now deals with all of life's problems. Not so quickly. I can be very thick headed. Later in the week I dealt with a company who had supposedly reserved a truck for us to move some things. At the last moment I discovered that our truck was not available. This time the walls of my kitchen threatened to enclose me. That feeling was only for a moment. I did panic and change companies. Again the question came into my head "Is God in this or am I acting like I'm alone?" Maybe tattooing the question on my hand would help or perhaps not using the question for just big problems but also for the little happenings of life.
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